My One Big Eyeball #3

Battlestar Galactica 3x04 - "Exodus (Part 2)"
Episode grade: A+

PREVIOUSLY: Cylons enslaved most of what was left of humanity, but Galactica's coming to the rescue.

NOW: Boom! Bang! Whee! Ooooooooooooooooh! Boom! Boom! WOAH. Kablammo! So, yeah. Apollo changes his mind, so the Pegasus joins the rescue crew at a crucial moment, and, though they take heavy losses, the human race leaves the cylons (and that esteemed weasel Gaius Baltar, and baby Hera) in the dust. Among the casualties; Ellen Tigh, Hera's surrogate mother Maya, and the Battlestar Pegasus. *sniff*. I'll miss you all! Most everyone who makes it to Galactica celebrates more than they've ever celebrate before, because why wouldn't you? Well, maybe if you were forced to, say, poison your wife and leave her dead on New Caprica. Or you've spent the last four months being completely frakked with by the creepiest cylon of all, and it turns out the daughter he gave you, who you absolutely love by this point, is actually someone else's daughter that he stole from a random New Caprican, and you have to give her back. Yeah, that'd do it.

WHAT I THINK OF IT ALL: There is literally no way I can express that in actual words. It's not hyperbole, this episode, and this show actually really is that good. I'm serious. And not only that, it keeps on getting better. I just cannot conceive how it is possible to do that. And frankly, I think this episode could have done with being split into two again and made it a three parter, because I'm fully certain they could have made at least another episode out of all the stuff they didn't get a chance to pack into this one with everything that went on. And what the hell is going to happen next? Roslin and Zarek are totally going to hook up, and it will be awesome, for sure. Starbuck and Tigh may also hook up, and that would be incredibly frakked up, but also awesome. Gaius is with the cylons and like woah. The politics will go crazy nuts. Technically, I think Tom Zarek is president now? Or he resigned as vice president when the occupation began and it's... Felix Gaeta? I just don't know. At all. I'm just so excited to see where they take this now. Man.


Desperate Housewives 3x04 - "Like It Was"
Episode grade: B+

PREVIOUSLY: Susuan went off with Ian, so she missed Mike waking up. That's pretty much the main thing that's still important by now. Oh, and Andrew returned from his homelessness. I guess that was quite important too.

NOW: Well, of course Mike has amnesia. DUH. So, he totally can't remember anything that's happened, pretty much since the show started. It's probably for the best. Well, except Edie gets to him first and totally poisons his mind against Susan, because she's mean like that. Ian's cabin gets little to no mobile signal, so it takes a while for the news to get to Susan, but when it does it's all a little heartbreaking. Meanwhile, in other storylines, crazy Nora takes a break after last week's overload, so Lynette bribes everybody to make Parker love baseball, or hate baseball, I can't even tell any more. Carlos thinks the divorce is all fun and games until Gabby tells him about her affair with John (her new affair, I mean. He knew about the other one, of course.) Bree finds out about just what Andrew got up to while he was away, and Bree and Andrew and Orson are all kind of lovely together, while Danielle is sleeping with her history teacher. Ho hum.

WHAT I THINK OF IT ALL: I'm definitely getting more into this season now, and most particularly Bree and Orson. Andrew's return most definitely helped their whole storyline to not seem like a terrible rehash of George. Susan's story is so, so much better this year, and I'm really not entirely sure why. Gabby and Carlos were excellent fun this week too. But, while I appreciate the need for a break from crazy Nora in Lynette's story, this wasn't the way to go with that, and let the side down a little. Still, three out of four is NOT BAD.


Heroes 1x04 - "Collision"
Episode grade: A

PREVIOUSLY: Claire answered the question "How do you wake up dead?". Hiro and his buddy Ando followed the comic's instructions and went to Vegas. Nathan was a bitch to Peter, Simone was a bitch to Isaac.

NOW: Claire wakes up on the autopsy table, says "Oh my god" this time because they can't censor by cutting out halfway through the word, sneaks out while the coroner is on the phone and, after meeting one of his previous victims, gets revenge on Rapey the Quarterback by crashing his car into a wall at top speed. With him in the passenger seat. Awesome. Matt also wakes up on a table, this one with arm and leg straps so he can't sneak out, and Claire's creepy dad being all creepy at him, along with a bald black guy (maybe Sylar) who can apparently block powers, because his mind-reading is pretty much a no-show. Ando encourages Hiro to use his powers to cheat at the casino, which wins them big money, but then gets them beaten up. Also in Vegas, Niki seduces Nathan in order to repay her debt to the mob guy, but backs out at the last second. However, the elevators have reflective surfaces, so ikiN takes over and, after beating up a thug, seals the deal. Claire's creepy dad and his power-blocking lackey visit their post-coital huddle, but are only taking one of them, though which will have to wait for next week. Peter goes to see Mohinder, who is starting to be sceptical about it all, but is unable to demonstrate his power due to a) Nathan being in Vegas, b) Isaac being too busy painting Claire to let them in, and c) Peter not knowing any other Heroes. On the subway ride home, time stops for everyone but Peter, because post-apocalyptic non-dorky future Hiro, rocking a samurai sword and speaking perfect English, has a message for him.

WHAT I THINK OF IT ALL: Oh man. How much do I love this show. A lot. A lot is how much. Now that everyone's actually starting to meet, there's less disparate strands of storyline to keep track of, and the less interesting Heroes don't have to rely solely on their own ability to keep me interested. And, interestingly, it's all the less interesting ones who do the most colliding; Claire's still very much on her own, and despite being in the same place as a couple of them, Hiro & Ando don't run into the others. Claire's calculated murder, however much of an irredeemable bitch the guy was, is like woah darkness, which you KNOW I love. Also love all of the following; actually seeing ikiN this time, instead of blacking out on her along with Niki, and her being every bit the badass she seemed. Isaac's painting effects and especially the time stopping effects are so very cool to watch. And of course, that ending. Future Hiro gave such a perfect sense of world weariness. I can't wait until, like, season seven or whenever when we actually get to see the time that Future Hiro came from, and this show damn well better last long enough to get to that.


Lost 3x03 - "Further Instructions"
Episode grade: A

PREVIOUSLY: Locke had a crisis of faith or two, but Desmond and his hatch restored his faith by shining a light, then exploding and turning the sky purple.

NOW: So, turns out my guesses on the three lostaways we'd catch up on this week were wrong. For a start, more than three; we see our whole non-kidnapped or sailing crew, so vastly diminished that some redshirts have to turn into actul characters. Hi, Nikki! Hi, Paolo! Nice to meet you. I assume we'll be finding more about you in one of the next couple of episodes. But most all of the screentime goes to Locke, Charlie, and slightly less so, Hurley. So Locke wakes up from the exploded but actually apparently IMploded hatch with no voice and has to play charades to Charlie because apparently nobody else is the least bit interested in where he's been for the day that's passed since hatch implosion. Locke has a little crazy awesome vision quest where dead Boone tells him to go rescue Eko, so he does so. Charlie follows, and is as annoying as possible, as is his wont, and on the way they run into Hurley, who's back with his message from the Others. But in the end, they rescue Eko from the polar bear, Hurley finds a naked Desmond, who's even more crazy than before and can apparently SEE THE FUTURE, and Locke takes up Jack's torch and becomes the unelected leader of the lostaway tribe, and gives an Adama-style "I'M GETTING MY MEN" speech.
Meanwhile, in flashback land, Locke joined a hippy commune. Fun!

WHAT I THINK OF IT ALL: Man, why was this not the season opener? I know you'd get the annoying fans all WHAT ABOUT KATE AND SAWYER/JACK, but fuck them. This should have been the season opener. Vision quest was way freaky and cool, as they should be. Desmond was also way freaky and cool, as he should be. Charlie being annoying to Locke was much less annoying to me than usual, somehow, and woah, character continuity paid a visit to Craphole Island, loved that Charlie is still bitter about the only good part of "Fire + Water"; Locke punching him in his stupid hobbit face. Flashback was totally not what I'd expect from a Locke flashback, pretty interesting. It seemed to get less screentime than flashback usually do, which I'm totally in favour of, less is more, I think. It might actually have had the same screentime as usual, and it just seemed shorter because I enjoyed it. I don't know. Anyway, all in all, it's been a pretty fucking awesome week in TV, that's for sure.